Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
