he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Is it because I queefed?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
