Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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