Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
