There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
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