I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
i came on her dog
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
