I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
The air was thick with penises
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
