highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize