heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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