Dual....:-)
Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Randomize
