is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
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