were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
