oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
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