And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
