What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
