i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
