just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
