Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I just want to make out with him forever
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Randomize
