I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize