He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
