I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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