I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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