Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
