I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
