My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
