**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize
