I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
