Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Randomize
