we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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