so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
