What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
