Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
