What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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