she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
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