I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
