she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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