Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
