YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
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