we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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