i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Randomize
