I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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