that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
