My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
