Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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