I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
