That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
