we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
