no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
now i know why i became what i already was.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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