I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
