DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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