there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
